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S3E2 – ; Tarps Off with JD Lewis

JP August 17, 2021


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Transcript of S3E2. JD Lewis from CJAY92 joins us for a conversation about mental health, depression and suicide, and how he learned to overcome by prioritizing physical and mental well-being.

S3E2 – JD


VO:
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Seth:
So I was out for an early morning walk with my brother the other day, as you do early mornings, as I do very nice to be joined by someone, you know, other than blue Jay loved blue Jay he’s my boy. It’s not great for conversation the dog, you know, sometimes it’s nice to listen to a great listener, great listener.

And so I was in Wainwright and my brother and I went out for a walk in the morning before I left. And sun was shining. The skies were clear, the smoke had blown away. So nice breathing in that fresh Prairie air. And for those of you who don’t know, and, and many of you, I think do my brother’s death.

So the conversation, you know, holding a coffee, walking the dog and trying to do sign language at the same time was a, a bit of a juggling act. And I let blue Jay actually off for a little bit. He was kind of meandering around and then we came across some goats. So I wasn’t expecting that. Just like yard goats, I think like, yeah.

And goats, this is a great, great thing. Or, yeah, we were just outside of Wainright. We were on the fringes of Wainright.


JP:
You were on the fringes of the fringe,


Seth:
the fringe of the fringe. And we came across some yard goats. I had to at the time, blue Jay backup. But anyway, we’re on this walk and we’re chatting about life and just started going really deep.

And I realized that

I realized that for most of our lives, you know, I’ve been sort of big brother protector, Hey, I know what’s best. You should do this. You should do that. Why don’t you do this? How come you did that? Like that that’s very much the place I’ve come from with him and, and probably all of my siblings to some degree.

And there was just this moment where he was telling me this story. And you know, a lot of it was centered around the feeling of loneliness, right? Like him seeing everybody talking and laughing and carrying on and not being part of the conversation and just, it hurts. It’s hard, you know, it’s, it’s something we’ll never understand.

And you know, that factored with a lot of the stuff that he’s been through in his life. I’ve often come from a place of judgment. And in that moment I just saw him. And in that I saw myself and it was this feeling of calm, not feeling like I needed to help or save or, or tell them it was all going to be okay.

But just listening and being there, there for him, which, I mean, I’m sure I could go on, but for me, it just highlighted that as much work as I’ve done for myself over the last let’s, let’s call it three years still holding on to some stories, some judgements, some preconceived biases, or, you know, Seth knows best type mentality.

And to be able to let that go piece by piece. Is such a, a journey. And I think, you know, that, that the reason why I bring this up is as we get into this episode with J D it’s just so powerful when you become aware of the things that you do or how you show up in the world, that’s when you can really start to, to move forward.

And in a, I’m gonna say positive or productive way. I think we’ve had some long conversations about, as we moved into this coaching business from the podcast into podcast slash coaching, we’ve, we’ve talked long and hard about what our coaching model looks like. And it all kept going back to that.


JP:
Self-awareness like, everything we talked about was, well, you can’t do that if you’re not aware of it. And however you come across that in your case, through, you know, personal discovery during a conversation, sometimes other people’s. Tell you what’s wrong. Sometimes it’s a, it’s a longer journey. But whatever means you can, you can discover more about yourself.

Like it’s a, it is a long and difficult road. Like it is a, I think of it like a Niagara falls. Like it’s a, it’s an erosion process for you to break those barriers and, and peel back the onion and get down to those things that you need to change. And certainly since we introduced that coaching model, the more I think about it, the more we talk about it, the more conversations we have, like we have today with JD, the more I dig deeper and the more I uncover about myself too.


Seth:
Yeah. There’s a, there’s a great quote. I believe from Steve Chandler and for those of you who aren’t, who don’t know Steve Chandler. I highly recommend checking easy. He’s got a he’s on for, oh, no, not that Chandler. He’s got a plethora of, of books and he’s a, an amazing coach by all accounts. And I’ve had the opportunity to work with some people who have worked with him.

And he, he’s got some amazing models and concepts, but one of the quotes that I really liked that I heard from him was you can’t leave somewhere. You’ve never been. And I mean, obviously you relate that to a physical place, right? Like that makes total sense. I’ve never been there. How can I leave there?

But when you think of it from a mental capacity or, or, or a mindset capacity, if you’ve never had that moment of truth or that moment of awareness, how do you let it go? How do you move forward? You can’t like, and I think that’s sort of the point you were getting at there. And to me, like those moments are.

Probably happening all the time. It’s just, when you have that clarity of thought and an open heart and you show up without judgment and, and, you know, just fully these things start to connect and, and you know, that, that was one of those moments for me. And I think it’s a thing that people say too, right?


JP:
Like they, they say they’re showing up fully, but, but are they really like in the, in the coaching conversations I have either with clients or with myself, like internally or coaches with me it’s really about uncovering whether or not you’re actually showing up or are you just saying it’s because it’s really hard to say that no, I’m not showing up.

Like that is, that is a hard thing to do is to beat yourself down a little bit like that and say, you know what? I’m not perfect. I’m not showing up the way that I need to show up. What do I need to do. And I think that’s something that JD in the conversation that we had, that he did the things he uncovered about himself by just taking the moment to self-reflect and multiple moments over the course of time.

But taking those moments to self-reflective really helped him uncover who he is and where he needs to take his


Seth:
and I, and I think this was something that I was made aware of. I had attended a one of those Saturday free coaching sessions, I think for integral coaching. This was a few months back and I ended up in one of those breakout rooms with a very nice lady from Brooklyn.

And I was telling her about my journey and my story and, and one of the things she said back to me reflected back to me that I never would’ve thought of or never would have occurred to me. I really love how compassionate you are about your former self, right? Like you recognize that there were faults, there were challenges is you needed to improve and you took steps to do so, but you’re not looking back at that person in a negative or a regretful way.

And, and the reason I bring that up is I think that’s, that’s very much the feeling I got from JD. You know, he, he knew that he, his life as it was going was not sustainable. And, you know, we, we get into a bunch of, of that. And, and, you know, he, he knew that he needed to make some changes and he did that. And I think the, the, the beautiful part of that is, you know, when he w at least the sense I got was that he’s compassionate for that person that he used to be.

But now moving forward, excited about the person that he is, and, and it’s turning. I think you can, it goes one of two ways. You’re often, you know, either way too hard on your farmer, self or you love and respect who that former person was because it got you to where you are today and the latter one leads to so much more for yourself.


JP:
If you can, if you can embrace who you were and understand and take the time to reflect on it. And, and like you said, right off the top of there have that moment of clarity and that personal reflection, it really helps you to move on. And it really helps you to improve who you are. To be a better who you’re going to be, maybe not who you are, because that’s just in the moment.

But you, you have a choice to make of who you’re going to be.


Seth:
I think with that, you know, again, if folks at home, if you’re willing maybe take a, take a moment here and reflect on how far you’ve come and get yourself in the head space for, for JDS journey that he’s about to share with us. And I think if you, if you take that moment and, and we’ll leave a little gap here, think about some of the things that you’ve done, that you never thought you would have been able to do.

And does that inspire you in terms of the next steps that you’re going to take towards some things that maybe you can’t see right.

Welcome to the biz dojo with Seth and JP this week, we’re joined by JD Lewis, J D how are you, man? Very good. Thank you. Except for the air quality, I can complain about one thing. It would be the air quality right now, which feels about on par with like a bowling alley or a bingo hall in central Alberta. I feel, yeah, I’ve had, I’ve had enough smoke for one.

So JD, we’re really excited to have you on the show. I thought I’d just kick it over to you to introduce yourself to the listeners. If you’re from Calgary, you’ve probably heard JD on CJ 92 the morning show, or maybe just tell us a little bit about yourself to kick things off here. Yeah. I I do the morning show.

JD: I wake people up for a living at CG 92. I’ve done that for the better part of 10 years now with various cast of characters. I started by riding shotgun with the great Jerry Forbes for a few years. Who’s like the best dude to learn off of ever. And now I work with a dude named Jesse mods and we do the the morning show at CJ from five until 10:00 AM mountain standard time until they find.


Seth:
You guys have been doing that for a while? When did Jerry retire was like three, four years ago now?

JD: Yeah. But four years ago retired. Well, yeah, the only reason I remember that, or at least remember the time of year was he retired the Thursday of Easter weekend and we always joke that maybe we would bring Jerry back from the dead on Monday.


Seth:
That’s awesome. What what do you enjoy most about doing the morning? So you said you wake people up for a living. What do you find most fulfilling about your job? I guess, I suppose officially it’s, it’s probably that it’s a blank canvas every day. You know, you just get to, I get to show up and just decide what’s what’s going to be on the show that day.

JD: I mean, it’s not all dictated by me. Not only do I have a partner in crime content-wise and Jessie. You know, we also only get to do so much deciding on that front. Yeah. Because you’re really talking about what’s going on in the world. And especially in the world we live in today, you don’t know what that’s going to look like.

I can’t tell you what tomorrow’s gonna look like, because it seems to get increasingly crazy each day. But, but the neat thing is as a, as somebody, you know, who has has a brain that just craves creating it’s so cool. Cause the creating never stops and everyday does look so different. I love it. From that standpoint.

I also love that . Just getting to be a companion to people is the part I think I always loved about radio, even as a kid who grew up in listened to a ton of it growing up in rural Alberta. You know, it’s the same thing I love about it today. Doing it for a living is, is you just get to provide companionship.

I always loved that about the radio now to be on the other end of that equation is very satisfying.


JP:
It’s very cool that you get to work and you get to put together a show. Does it work like that for you? Like I know a lot of shows. People think that when you’re in radio, that’s what you do. You show up and you just talk.

But I know a lot of shows spend a fair bit of time thinking about content and how they’re going to curate the show for people. How much, how much extra time does that take outside of the 5:00 AM to 9:00 AM window?

JD: The perception is kind of like, oh, you work five hours a day. And you’re like, yeah, well, that’s definitely part of it.

That, that ain’t all of it. You’re you’re right. You know, w we all have like, kind of different ways we do it. I think even Jesse does it a very different way than I do. We just kinda exchange one big gigantic text message a week, send one off during the day, just for stuff we’ve seen. I kind of prefer to work through the day sporadically.

I’ll break it up with. In a dog walks or fitness classes or, or just like reading whatever it might be, kind of break the day up and just kind of come and go from my preparation until the afternoon. And then just try to treat it like a work day, honestly, and do my best to be done by a five or six, because that balance really seems to work for me.

And then you kind of show up the next morning or whatever and realize a lot of it is probably, you know, useless at that point. You have to start over because things happen so fast and the news cycle is, is crazy wild. But yeah, I think, I think pre-planning as much as you can, but also trying to keep as much spontaneity in it because that’s how people react to things now.

And odds are, you’re not even really relaying information. A lot of the time, you’re just trying to react to stuff at the exact same time other people are because we don’t relay news anymore. People don’t come to us for news. A lot of the times they don’t even come to us for the information. Really odds are, they have it.

They want to know what we think about it. They want to talk about it with us. It’s kind of a gig now.


JP:
Yeah. They’ve already got the 14 notifications about the Olympics first thing in the morning. So they don’t, they don’t, they don’t need you to tell them that something happened. So JD, one of the things we wanted to dive into today or our topic this week is really around personal awareness and how that is played a role in your journey.


Seth:
Personally, obviously and one of the things that just tipped in my mind there, you know, being the morning show guy being up at four in the morning, all the time for years and years and years, how has that affected you outside of work? Like obviously being on a totally different schedule than most other 20 to 35 range, like you’re, you’re living this totally different schedule.

How have you found balance in your personal life and, and the morning show?

JD: I think it was really hard out the gate because you know, like the schedule can be conducive to some really terrible habits. If I’m being honest, like I’m not going to pretend I’m hard done by, you know, being done at 10 o’clock every day, because I know that probably sounds enviable.

It can, it can come with, or can, can grow some warts, I guess, like you kind of have the whole day and that whole, you know, expression about idle hands being the devils, it’s accurate, to be honest, that I wound up with too much free time out the gate and I didn’t use it all constructively. So I think I realized pretty quickly if you’re going to do this for any prolonged period of time and keep your sanity and also just be good company, not only to yourself, but to the people that matter to you, you have to be able to shut it off and you have to be able to take a break from it.

You have to make sure you’re balancing it out. You know, all that like creative energy and, and, and putting on a show in the morning. You gotta balance that out with, with quiet time and just some good foundational things, I suppose, you know, just, it was I was over-caffeinated mess for many, many years.

And I think, you know, just, just small things like, you know, making sure that sleep was a priority was, was a huge, huge part of it. Just making sure either a good night’s sleep or partnering a night’s sleep with a nap during the day. That was really important, drinking a ton of water, just making sure you’re taken care of.

No, your body and your brain so that you can keep doing it because it can take a lot out of you weirdly. It probably doesn’t sound tiring, but I mean, you guys know you, you broadcast it, you get it, it takes something out of you. It really does.


JP:
I remember when I started working in radio, I I started with the late night shift, but then, because I was the new guy, I would get the call to help out with the morning show, doing the board up.

And so I’ve, I feel, yeah, you’d want, when you’re on the late night, you’re like, oh, I can just stay up forever now. Cause I don’t work again until 4:00 PM. And when you’re the morning, you’re, you’re kind of thinking the same thing at 12 o’clock one o’clock in the morning and you’re like, ah, I gotta go to work in three hours.

I might as well just stay up, fight through it. I’ll just drink a ton of red bulls. What could possibly go wrong? I’ll workout. Well, yeah. Was there a moment JD that you can think of when you were, you know, the caffeinated mess as it were where you were like, I can’t do this anymore. I got to start making some changes.

JD: Cliche as it might sound it. I remember seeing some photos of myself actually, truthfully and I, I just, I didn’t really like the way I looked and I don’t mean that from a vanity perspective, I just, like, I caught a look at myself a few different times and thought like you don’t, I don’t look real healthy.

And then I thought about like how healthy I didn’t feel and how, like, it just didn’t feel like I was of sound body or mind to be honest. And it’s funny how that stuff can slip if you’re not mindful. You know, if you don’t really keep your finger on that pulse, you can end up in a, in a pretty weird spot and kind of go, whoa, that escalated very quickly, you know, to, to quote the will Ferrell.

It’s like it, it can happen so quick. So I don’t know that I remember like a super distinct moment. I just remember like getting tired of it. Like not only being tired physically, but tired, mentally and going, I think it’s probably time to just start taking care of myself because some of the stuff that flies in, you know, like your late teens, early twenties, some of the stuff you can do, I guess, and the hours you can keep in the mindfulness, you can ignore the older you get.

The less, that flies I find. Did you have any goals or anything that that you were kind of working towards that you found were really, really a struggle before you started to set yourself on this kind of personal awareness path? Yeah, I’d say honestly, even just like, you know, from, from a show perspective from a, you know, like an industry perspective, I just, like, I was struggling professionally to like, bring it consistently.

I felt like I could have like a, you know, a good show or a few good shows. And then I would just, I would really, really struggle when I couldn’t find consistency. And I looked at people that I respected in my line of work and just people I admired in general, you know, just people who, who, you know, live their lives the way I wanted to live mine.

I looked at what they were doing and you know, what they were doing to, to bring it with consistency. And I thought, you know, there’s, there’s gotta be a secret sauce. So I think, yeah, that’s kind of where I just started some people that I, that I looked up to and thought like, that’s, that’s what we do do some goal setting, whether it was trying to make sure the radio show was, you know, constant, not only for me, but for the people that listen to it, you know, it was also just like making sure that I was taking care of myself physically.

I was, I had just, I had slept so hard and so fast. It was like, I think if we could write that ship, I’ll bet you, there would be some correlations like mentally. And that, that, you know, my performance would, would kind of catch up to. And lo and behold, like it’s all linked, man. You know, like taking really good care of the brain takes really good care of the body and vice versa.

They’re intrinsically tied feeling.


Seth:
talked about my story quite a bit on the show, I guess JP knows, but you know, there there’s a moment that I think of often, and it wasn’t just this moment, it was a series of moments, but I remember one day I was out for a walk with my son and I could still picture it.

It was like a nice summer day. It was August, 2018. And he says to me, dad, why are you so fat? And it just like, that just hit in a way where I like had no response. I had no more excuses. And I just like saw myself for a moment. And to your point, JD, I was like, I feel like all the time. And you know, I’m like in this fog and you know, I’m working hard, I’m trying to do all the right things for my family, but it was like, I gotta, I gotta make a change.

And the first thing I did was go for a bike ride. I hadn’t ridden a bike since I was like 12 and I’m 32 years old and I pulled the bike, a bike out of the shed and I go for a bike ride. And once I started getting into like having some physical activity in my routine, because I sit all day and you know, it’s very easy to get in that sedentary lifestyle.

Once I started incorporated physical fitness into, into my regular routine, everything started to change. And you realize, you know, when you look back, when you get down the road a little bit of, of, of getting more physically fit, you realize how much it affects your mindset. And I mean, it sounds like you’re, it’s probably, wasn’t quite as dramatic of a shift as mine.

Wasn’t a moment. But what advice, I guess, do you have to people who maybe want to take that next step to getting more physically fit and how much that helps them? You know, I think, I think you hit it right there in that it, it like for you, it just started with a bike ride, you know, like so much of it is just showing up and that might sound a little bit cliche, but it’s so true, you know, like it just like so much of, it was at least for me early on.

JD: Just showing up and actually putting that work in. And it was amazing how quickly that snowball could build, you know, and how, how quick you could gain some momentum. And then how, how quickly you could connect dot one and dot two, like, whoa, I’m treating my body better. And I’m making sure that like I’m prioritizing the right things and all of a sudden, like, I’m way better for it.

It’s it sounds like the biggest duhever. Every time I say that out loud, it really does. You’re like, oh, well, that’s really not much of a revelation, but, but in that moment, it really was for me, you know, you just like, I come back to this snowball. It’s like, you just, you gain momentum so quickly. And then you start to not only wonder how you ever did it the other way for so long, but it becomes harder and harder to picture ever doing it that way.

Again, you just think like, geez, now, now that I know how, how a well-oiled machine can run, why would I ever do private oil ever?


Seth:
It’s a good, that’s a good way to put it. That’s bike ride was the, still the same bike like he had when he was 12 banana seat, big basket on the front. Yeah. Or more or less. I don’t even know if I remembered how to shift gear.

Fifth gear. Yeah. Anyway, it was a, it was a site I’m sure. But it, it it’s spurned a lot.

JD: It’s funny how, like that expression, like it’s like riding a bike and they make you make it sound so easy. I like you said, what a very long time without riding a bike. And then about a month ago, a buddy of mine said, let’s bike from Campbell to Banff.

And I thought, well, you know, the old expression, it’s like riding a bike. I’m here to tell you, you can forget how to ride a bike and you can get really, really bad at riding your bike. I almost died before we even got the band. Yeah, no, it’s, it’s a, it’s a learned skill and you can, you can forget it for sure.


JP:
We’ve got a trail over here that I live at the top of the hill and behind cop, and there’s a couple trails over here that are really like awesome trails, amazing scenery. Great, great to bike ride. Great to bike, ride down. You forget that you also need to bike right up or walk up, but that takes a lot longer.

And when I went from my first bike ride, I thought, well, I’m a great biker look, I’ve gone like two kilometers. Like a kilometer and a half of that was downhill. So it was not, it was not so good on my return venture


Seth:
in in that vein JD, I know you mentioned the bike ride there. He also recently got back into or into swimming for the first time.

I know you had a, a pretty inspirational post about that. I don’t know if you want to share,

JD: I don’t know if you call it into it or back into it when you really haven’t done any swimming for the most part in like 20 years. And even then if you go back 20 years, like that was just me skipping swimming lessons.

So that even doesn’t count. I had like, I guess like two big hangups about swimming. The first was, you know, to be really transparent with you was, it was just tied to low self-esteem and a lack of self love. I didn’t want to take my tarp off. Oh yes. It was like a little bit of a chunkier kid, probably like now looking at photos, I’m like, whoa, you ballooned way harder than that, dude.

That was not your chunky phase. But like, you know, I just remember as a kid, like just not being confident at all. And that was like, you know, one of ’em. One of the most terrifying concepts to me, it was just like taking my shirt off. I had no interest in doing that and I would have found any excuse and I did find any excuse to never swim.

I forgot my trunks all the time at home. And they were never really forgotten. They were just left there, you know, so I had those hangups about it and to be honest, almost drowned when I was like seven or eight, I remember like a really scary moment in a lake near Rocky mountain house growing up. And I just, I was, I was really, really afraid of everything swimming entailed.

And I think like something I’ve tried, you know, over the last year or two, I’ve just been trying to be like a little less chicken shit, for lack of a more eloquent way of saying it about stuff. And just, I realized what, what power fear had over my life and how many of my decisions just on a day-to-day basis were built on a foundation of fear.

Like I was just, I was really just doing things that didn’t scare me. And I thought about, you know, some of the best things that had happened in my life historically. And they were all born out of doing things that scared the hell out. I thought, well, if we just do more of that, like, I feel like it’s just gonna, you know, that’s going to bear fruit, that’s going to yield some, some positive results.

And that’s, that’s probably where the gold lies. So some of it is just been like doing really well. It probably sounds like a simple thing and that’s just getting in the water, but I, I spent over two decades not getting in the water. And so this summer I just kinda pardon the pun, dipped my toe in the water and then dipped my lower half and my upper half as well.

And I don’t know, it’s, it’s been cool to just like become less afraid of swimming as a grown ass man. My girls got a pool at her place and when she first moved in about a year ago, I remember thinking like have fun in the pool. I won’t be in there and we were in the pool the other day and it was super fun.

And it’s like, you know, it’s just, it’s another way to sneak some fitness into your life. It’s, it’s a really fun group activity it’s made my summer infinitely better. It’s made me more confident. And I just, I dunno, it’s again, it probably sounds like a really simple thing, but that’s been like such a big breakthrough.

And so symbiotic of like the changes have been trying to like Institute and implement in my life. Be less of a chicken shit. Really?


JP:
I feel like that will connect with so many people like it just as an adult. I don’t know how many times I’ve thought a tarps off. No way. That’s not, that’s not happening here today.

I’m not letting people see what’s beneath this. Somehow my, somehow my shirt’s going to hide the fact, my extra large sized shirt is somehow hiding the fact. I don’t know what kind of camouflage I’m wearing, but what what, what would you say to those people who are kind of maybe in what we will call the chunkier phase or the tarps on phase of their lives right now?

What, what would you say to them to get them to take that step?

JD: I guess probably a couple of things, you know, first off I think I probably need to tell them exactly what you just said right there. That like a giant shirting high-demand odds are people who spend enough time with you have a, have a decent idea, probably what you look like with your tarp off, they hang out with you a lot.

So they probably know, even though you’re telling yourself, you fooled them, thanks to the kind of like. Shirts you’re wearing or whatever it might be like, you’re not really fooling anybody. And then I think you have to remind yourself that if, if these are people that matter to you, that they’re not basing your value to them on how you look with your shirt off.

But they might derive a bit of your value or, or, you know, base some of their opinion on you. If you’re going to be really weird about not taking your shirt off, you know, and I don’t mean to like shame or guilt anybody into doing it, but it’s just in hindsight, it was such a silly hangup to have, and it just, it held me back from like a lot of.

Just fun, cool stuff. And I think it like limited me socially. I think, you know, again, back back to the bike ride, like Steph is talking about it. It just, it starts with a really simple, easy step for me, that was just like, I was out with my girlfriend and her family on the lake may long weekend. I believe it was.

And you know, all the time other dudes had taken their tops off and I was like, you know what F it, like, we’re just going to do it. We’re just going to see how it feels. And we’re just going to give everyone here the benefit of the doubt that they’re really not to gauge their opinion of me on, on how I look when I undo these buttons and those small steps.

Again, back to this, this snowball thing, like those are building blocks, man. Like you can, you can build around that kind of momentum. And then all of a sudden it not only becomes easier. Take your shirt off and jump into the pool. But other stuff gets easier too in a weird way, because you’re like, you’re not living in fear anymore.


JP:
We hold onto those things. Just like, there is no way I think any of us or probably almost all of the listeners, if not all listeners would hold onto something like that. And a week later be talking about JDA. Did you see it? Did you see that guy with his shirt off? I’m like, it doesn’t play a part in their lives.

JD: It would be the worst conversational fodder ever. Can you imagine if we were up for beers, I was like, boy, you wouldn’t believe who looks awful with their shirt off. No, one’s going for beers with that guy ever again. If that’s what he’s bringing up over pipe, that’s not conversational fodder. That stuff doesn’t come up.

Cause that’s stuff. Doesn’t matter..


Seth:
The crazy thing is like having lost like a hundred pounds over the last few years, years. Like part of that was like, I didn’t want to go swimming with my kids. Cause I didn’t want to take my shirt off. And even still that feeling, and it doesn’t really go away. It’s like, I’ve lost a hundred pounds.

I’ve worked my ass off. But like there’s a little thing back there that still goes off every once in a while. Even, even though I’ve come so far. But I think the key for me was when I realized that everybody else is so wrapped up in their own shit and whatever it is that they’re trying to hide, they’re not looking at you.

And if they are they’re projecting their own insecurities or their own issues. And really that’s, that’s where the mental freedom came for me. It’s like, even if that person does say something. It’s more about them that has anything to do with me.

JD: I love what you said there, you know, about how it doesn’t really go away. Cause you’re right. Like I think probably the perception you have before you face the fear is that eventually once you vanquish it, it will, it will never speak to you again, you’re not ever going to have to deal with it again, once you’ve cleared that hurdle. But I don’t think that’s really true. I don’t, I don’t in my experience anyway.

And it sounds like yours as well. Like that, isn’t how it works. Like my therapist has been working with me on this thing called dear fear. We call the letters and it’s just writing a letter to the stuff that scares you, you know, and trying to take some of the power back and just personifying fear and something I’ve learned through doing that.

Like writing those dear fear letters has been like, you know, there’s not only a lot of power in like in, in like flipping fear off, but then in continuing to do so. And that that’s a part of the process that, you know, it’s not that like, you’re not still going to have be having some alarm bells going off in your head when stuff that used to scare you presents itself.

Again, it’s. All of a sudden you’re armed with the knowledge and the power of having faced that fear before. Right. So you can kind of look back and go, no, man, you don’t, you’re not driving the car anymore. I’m driving. Like you get that power back, but you’re right. That voice in the back of your head, those alarm bells that they don’t really ever fully go away.


JP:
Do you think those are connected at all? Like you work in media, but I mean, you work in a side of media that doesn’t deal so much with the physical appearance. But do you think there’s a connection there to, to, to media and to, you know, the, the social aspect of what people look like or how people should act?

Is that voice connected to that?

JD: I think so. If I were real honest about it with myself, definitely. You know, I just think, cause cause you’re seeking approval every morning, you know, literally every morning from five until 10. I’m just hoping to win people over. I think while that’s, you know, that that can be a fun thing like that can also crank the volume on your insecurities.

Right. Even if they’re not ones that like you have to face in your nine to five, or in my case, like the five to 10, even if like, you know, me taking my shirt off back to that for a second, isn’t something that really factors into our radio show at all. And it’s not a job I have to do tarp off.

Thankfully. I mean, you do, but you don’t have to do it, but it’s not required. No. It’s like, you know, you’re exactly right in it like that. It can absolutely be tied to like, you know, that seeking of approval and, and self love is, is a big, big part of it. And that’s been a big part of some of the work I’ve tried to do.

You know, the last, last couple of years is just finding a way to like myself and, and take solace in the right things and not let the wrong stuff. And in a lot of cases, fear, run the show.


Seth:
I know you’ve, you’ve had quite a few posts over the years just around mental health and how important that journey’s been to you.

And I know you’ve got the semi-colon tattoo on your. Is that a knuckle, I guess the upper knuckle. Yeah, there we go. Yeah, there we go. What is, what does that mean to you? Like having good mental health that journey, and I know we’ve kind of touched on some of the components, but if you look at it holistically sitting here today what does that mean to you?

JD: For me, to be honest I just, I, in hindsight now with, you know, with the benefit of, of just having a lot more clarity in my life and, and with, with hindsight being what it is, 2020, looking back on things with a clear lens. Now, I, I don’t think the way I was living before was sustainable. I think my mum, my mental health was just in such disarray.

If I had kept going the way I was, I don’t know how long it would have been here. And to be more transparent, I don’t know that I would be pure right now. And I think, I just think to be honest, like it got so bad and it got so scary at points. It scared me into action because I just, like I realized that, you know, I probably wanted, I wanted to keep going.

That’s the whole idea behind the semi-colon tattoo and the whole semi-colon movement. And I loved it when it came across it, because like any really relatable point on the mental health front, like you just, you take some solace and realizing like, you know, there’s other people that, that feel the way I do.

And there’s other people that deal with this stuff that I’ve dealt with and, and with the semi-colon specifically, and everybody that wears it, you know, with some pride, it’s like a semi-colon and literature is, you know, a point where the author could have stopped, but made a conscious choice to keep on going.

Right. That’s what it means from a literary standpoint. And when you apply to a mental health journey and those grapples, it’s like, you know, it’s, it’s having a moment where like, yeah, you, you really thought you didn’t want to keep going and, and acknowledging that like, those moments are going to present themselves again.

And that you’re going to have a choice to make. And it’s it’s taking pride in having made it through the right choice to, to keep on going and, and, and I guess like keeping the faith. You continue doing the right things or you continue finding reasons to keep on going. Even when it gets really frigging hard.

It’s, what’s really cool about the tattoo honestly, is just like how often it can come up at the most random times from the most random people, you’ll be at a, Sobey’s run them through the till and you go to tap your card. And I’ve had a cashier go like, ah, semi-colon cool. And it’s just like this weird, like little, like, like a quiet fist bump, right.

Where you’re like, okay, like you too. Huh? Bull still here that you get it, you get it. And we’re both still here and it’s going to be all right. I know that might sound a little bit corny, but I swear to God, there’s a ton of power.


Seth:
Oh, that’s, that’s really beautiful. And I think sort of spills into the next part of this, which is, you know, JP and I talk a lot about community and how important that is.

And I mean, you can think in the broad sense, you know, Calgary or, or, or a town, but the, the community that you keep in terms of the circle and the people that you surround yourself with, how important has that been to this leg of your journey

JD: dialogue has, has been everything. Having people in my life, they keep me accountable. They keep the dialogue going like that that’s been so, so powerful because I’ll have a propensity at times to want to kill the dialogue or stop the dialogue and not have honest conversations with myself. And, you know, having people in place to call you on your shit really, you know, and to, and to check in with you and just, you know, give you to not only love you, but to give you the tough love when you need it to.

You know, I decided to, I also don’t know if I would be here if it wasn’t for really great people in my life that have helped me along in that there’s so much power in dialogue. And just in just talking about it, I think that that’s probably something that like, you know, when, when you’re first starting to address it, the mental health journey or, or you’re thinking about, about writing your ship a little bit, you, you hear that dialogue is really powerful and you go, I don’t know how it could be like, just talking to them.

Like we need to get to the doing part, not the talking about what good is talking about it, going to do, especially when it’s, when I’m having to explain what’s going on up here to somebody who may or may not get it. Like, why would I roll those decks? That seems like a waste of mine and maybe their time.

But what you realize very quickly is that you can take a lot of that power back just by talking about your stuff, you know, like, and it doesn’t matter necessarily. It has to be falling on the ears of someone who totally gets it. But even just like somebody being there for it, as soon as you say it out loud, it gets less scary.


Seth:
So I’ve been working with a coach this year and I had a lot of biases. I’m going to say negative biases towards like a life coach or an executive coach, like thinking, oh, people who need help get that. And then I’ve come to realize in working with one just how powerful and useful it is, but your brain is like an echo chamber.

So you could have something like rattling around in there for years and years, and years and years, that could be scary. It could be preventing you from doing something, whatever. And all of a sudden, you like you get into a safe space and you verbalize that and it can just change everything like that.

Like all of a sudden the story you’re telling yourself, you can just, you can let it go. Or, you know, someone hears something a little bit different and all of a sudden, you know, it extrapolates into a plan or, or, or meaningful idea. So like that concept of talking to someone and verbalizing those things that you’re thinking for me has led to just these moments of clarity and, and, and just moving forward in a way that.

You know, if I look at the last six months, six to eight months in my life, mentally more clarity, more progression than the first 34 years before that. So I just, I love the point you were making there.

JD: You know, it’s probably true for the fairer sex too, but, but as guys, like, we’re just, we’re so bad at it still we’re getting better, but like, we’re still so bad about talking about our mental health and yet like over beers, we’ll be more than willing to tell you about how we, like, we screwed up our leg at hockey rider or bolt like any other injury, right?

Like you bash your, your thumb with a hammer in the garage. Like you’ll willingly bring that up. But like, we’re so bad at like talking about the health of this, which is the most important before all of it. Like, you know, that, that, that drives everything. And we’re S we’re so bad at, at, at times talking about it.

I love seeing how, how guys are starting to talk about it. We can have conversations like these, cause you know, there’s so much power in it. A lot of times you, you talk about the dialogue and the conversation and how important it is. And that just is assumed to be just the therapy thing. But when I was I was like 1920 something.

And I I’d been dealing with with suicidal thought for a long time. I had come to know it pretty well at that point, to be honest. And I remember my dad telling me in conversation when I was 19 or 20, about how, when he was real sick, when I was probably 15 or 16, he he had gotten to a a point of despair when it had gotten so bad.

You know, with this health journey that he was so frustrated and our family didn’t have any answers as to what had dads so sick. He told me about standing on the side of the highway and at the edge of the QE two and thinking about jumping into traffic. And it was like, it was this holy shit moment.

You know, that I, that I, I still go back to, and it is still such a vivid memory because it was such a Eureka for me. And it really speaks to the power of dialogue in that, like, it was a really hard thing to hear, and it was really scary to hear that my dad had thought about killing himself, but it was also really powerful because it automatically made it in a weird way.

Less scary and a whole lot more human and a whole lot more. Okay. For me to have been feeling the way I had felt, if that makes sense. Like it was, it was so like, oh, okay. Like actually feel better now dad, because like, if you were dealing with it, you know, and, and, and you’re okay, you’re strong. Eh, maybe I’m going to be okay too, that the dialogue is, is just, it’s so important and it’s so important.


JP:
Well, people always think that you just need to have this inner strength and deal with things yourselves. And I think that’s a very dangerous thing to have out there. And I love, like, I love that you’re having this conversation, not just with us today, but through social media. Like I think, I think that’s incredibly powerful, especially if I feel like you’re using your audience for good, which there’s a ton of people out there who use their audience for vanity or use it, our audience for, you know, whatever, whatever they need for personal gain.

And I think it’s incredible to see you use your audience the way that you are.

JD: Thank you. Thank you. I really appreciate that. The thing is it’s on all of us, you know, platform or not, you know, I just think it’s on all of us to just, just be talking about it as much as possible. It may be, you know, men’s mental health you know, has been in disarray for a long time, you know, and, and mental illness and men has been snatching bodies way too many of them for way too long.

But at least we could do is talk about it because if it were anything else, you know, that we’re snatching that many bodies we’d be talking about a whole lot more than we do mental illness.


JP:
. Your, your point on like the injuries hit home for me playing hockey and whatnot. Like it’s almost like a badge of honor to have this physical injury that you tell the story about how it happened.

Do you, you know, you talk about, oh, you know, I slid into the boards and I broke my wrist and then I came back and played more hockey and everyone’s, you know, cheering. But when it’s a mental thing, you hold back and you don’t want to say anything about it because you’re worried that it’s going to make you seem weak and not strong.

I really feel like the, you know, the mental recovery and the journey to the recovery is really not that different from physical journey to recovery. We’ve got all these scars. I know, I read somewhere that in, I believe it was in China when they break plates or Japan, when they break plates, they, they actually use gold to put the plate back together.

And that part of the plate is actually stronger than the entire rest of the plate as a result. So if you can just start talking about it and start putting those pieces back together, you can really make a difference in yourself and actually make yourself stronger in other areas. And I feel like the conversation we’re having right now, I feel like that’s.

You’re saying is happening for you. Like you started to put certain pieces back together and it made other parts of your life stronger. You’ve had these conversations you’ve been working towards, you know, having a regular conversation in a space to talk about mental health. In addition to the physical stuff you’ve been doing, how has that affected the way that you do things like approach your everyday work or, you know, approach your, your time after the, we say five to 10, but really probably five to five.

JD: Yeah. Yeah. It you know, I think, I think implementing things like like meditation has been such a game changer for me just, just giving the brain a break, you know, and, and sometimes it’s just like little, little tiny sentences or observations that that will come out of a meditation or, or sometimes it’s honestly just like giving your brain a quick.

You know, it’s, it’s, it’s crazy how powerful even just, just that is. And I’ll know, hopefully, ideally I’ve set a bunch of reminders in my phone to, to try and do it more regularly, but I try to like, you know, slot the meditation and just because that’s been such a, like a powerful tool, I’ll try to get a quick meditation in before the show, to just like, you know, like a suede, any, any nerves that might be going on.

And he’s like, you know, sometimes it’s just kinda hard to clear the fog in the morning and that’s a great way to do it. Oftentimes after the show, it’s still kind of like riding that high there’s, there’s a real like adrenaline rush that kind of comes with it. And, you know, it’s, it’s important to like kind of shut that off and segue into just like leading a little bit more of a normal life for, for the remainder of the day and making sure like those hours are productive, you know?

And then like even just getting to sleep, like, you know, meditation in the evenings and that mindfulness journaling has been really powerful. I alluded to those was dear fear letters. That’s, that’s been a really great tool and also gratitude journaling. You know, it was really like one of the. The first like mental health exercises.

I think I plugged into my daily life and that was just keeping a journal. I kept it in the backpack and I took it literally everywhere. I’d take it to Europe on vacation with me. I would take it to work every day and it just followed me. It w it was always with me so that I would just any moment, at least once a day, ideally more than that, you had a moment of gratitude.

You’d write down that, that thing. That was so great. And it’s funny how that little trick you can play on your brain. Just, just counting a blessing incrementally like that before, you know, it like the brain starts to just lean a little more positive than negative. For a lot of us, you know, that that little tiny shift can be a gigantic difference maker.


JP:
I’ve had that conversation. Actually. That’s a real thing. Like I know you’re not supposed to use coaching mechanisms on you. That’s true. I don’t know. Don’t tell anyone. But no, like my wife and I had had this conversation that she wants to be more positive and not when she has an overwhelming day, not feel like it’s over and she’s a school teacher, so high school teachers.

So that’s, some of those days can be a little overwhelming. And one of the things that we talk about is, you know, when she comes home and we’ll talk a little bit about those things, but then we’ll, we’ll talk about two or three. Went particularly well that day or that she’s thankful for that day. And it completely changes the tone for the conversation that she started when she came through the door and she starts to look at those things differently.

And I mean, I do the same thing for myself, which is why I, I mentioned it to her and I found that it worked and it certainly worked for her. So, and I know we’ve had some, we’ve been doing some interviews this week to, to prep for the season and it’s come up more than once now, having that kind of thankfulness journal, if you will just, you know, having, having some sort of way to document your gratitude, it’s a, it’s a great way to attack it.

And for mindfulness you mentioned that you were doing a few things there. One thing that I’ve mentioned, I think very early on in our show was the mindful moment, which is a, there’s a YouTube video for that. And man, has that ever played a part in my life? Just being able to step back and. For a second, which I know is particularly hard to do when you work in radio.

And the whole job is to keep, keep things flowing and don’t leave any dead air. Can’t have more than two seconds of dead air at any given time.

JD: It’s funny, like you mentioned, like the momentum of it all, you know, cause that, that very much is like how, how the, the process of a morning show will run is it’s just kids it’s nonstop.

It’s just, what’s the next thing. What’s the next thing. And one thing I’m kind of guilty of, and one thing that was a big revelation from therapy and meditation was that like, you know, emotions good or bad or are meant to be like clouds. The whole idea is like, it’s supposed to just kinda keep going, but you know, you can have this this tendency to like latch onto emotions and then just like run with them.

And before you know it, like it’s, it’s firing way too quick and you can’t keep up with, with, with all of it. It’s amazing how just like taking a few minutes to, to be mindful like that these sound like small little things and they are like, really, you know, whether it’s writing in a gratitude journal, writing a letter to your fear, taking a moment to meditate, even just like doing 10 quick breasts to just kind of reset.

It’s crazy how much that can do to just kind of restore order. You’d give, you know, every other organ in the body, a break, if it needed it, like for God’s sake, cut your brain, that slack.


VO:
You know, being an artificial intelligence voice. Isn’t exactly easy. We work 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Thank you for calling Acme corporation. When you’re at work, we’re at work. When you’re sleeping, we’re still hard at work. When you’re out with the kids at soccer, we’re trying to understand your grandmother’s prescription refills.

So she doesn’t have to talk to a pharmacist when you’re eating dinner. We’re on the tax department. All right, let’s not talk about that, but when you’re drinking a coffee, we’re drinking coffee too. And we only drink the smoothest richest blend of ethically sourced, Canadian roasted beans. The beers Del Joffe has both a masters medium roast and a dark roast that are shorter, satisfying, no matter if you’re entering or Pinker.

Or screaming at your phone as you smash zero to speak to an agent because I pretended I didn’t understand you. Ah, the bees dojo brand Kofi, press one for yes. Message. The biz dojo to place your order today. My name is grace and I believe you’re wrestling and you’re listening to the biz Dodo. You should check out our podcast.

It’s called the face first podcast. Thanks for listening


Seth:
. Oh, so much good stuff. I think I have to bring this up, back to back episodes, JP. I feel like JD, you might’ve checked this out. Have you checked out the Rizza guided meditation? I have. Yes. Yes, God. So good. So good. Yeah. But a Starbucks collaboration.

If I remember correctly, is that how that came to be? He was working with like taser tea or something like that. Yeah, that’s right. Yeah. Yeah.

JD: It could just guide me through life like that kind of meditation album is so fun, but man, if I could just have like woo whispers in my ear full time all the time, all the time, just all the time.


Seth:
If you could outsource the voice in your head to just be there as a, that would be ideal,


JP:
Waze got Morgan Freeman to do GPS. I wonder if they could get,

JD: everybody’s got a number.


Seth:
I can’t, this, this is flying by really, really enjoying this J D I think one thing I wanted to circle back on just your platform, what you guys are doing at CJ. And I haven’t listened to as much the last two years on account of not having a morning commute anymore.

I actually think back to a time driving on probably Deerfoot or, you know, kind of in that Memorial area. And I think it was back when Jerry was on the show and you guys would do your Friday, what does it make a wit not make a wish secret wish your wish. Literally like I’m pulling into work.

It’s like seven 50 and I’m crying. Because of some of like this, I can’t remember the exact one, but like some of the stuff you guys did is just incredible. Is there anything that stands out in terms of a story from one of those that has really stuck with you over the years? Or, you know, what, what does that whole program means to you

JD: You know it’s neat, when I jumped on with Jerry, because I got to do, you know, I think, I think in total it was close to four years of radio with a guy.

He was, I’d talk all the time about how he was a great guy to learn off of. But, but I don’t really mean it fundamentally. Like Jerry’s fundamentals weren’t ever great. And he’d be the first guy to tell you that I’m not slandering Jerry Forbes. He tell you that like, that’s that, that wasn’t his like bread and butter, you know, Jerry was great, right?

It’s so many different things, but one of the things he was absolutely best at, and one of the secrets to his success, and one of the first things he taught me was that, you know, this platform, we have the show that we do in this radio station that we’re on. It’s, it’s here to help people, you know, like that.

Like we ha we have a responsibility with this platform. This is a fun job. And it’s, it’s never not going to be fun. But we also have like a great responsibility that comes with it, that to, just to do some good here. So like, you know, the, the CJ kids fun and, and, and the secret wish for many, many years, as a part of it was, was just such a cool tool to, you know, act as some immediacy when, when brutal things would happen in and around the area, we were just able to, to step in.

And you’re not forced our way and just, you know, approach a family or a situation and go. How can we help, you know, I guess a couple of quick ones come to mind. I remember a kid up in in Airdrie had his insulin pumps stolen from the dressing room when he was out playing hockey and came back into the locker room and he’s a diabetic kid who needs his insulin pump.

That’s a pretty big part of his day to day and somebody jacked it. And that’s a seven or $8,000 expense, which is no small thing to a mom and dad like that, that would really, really suck. And we caught wind of that story and we made a couple of phone calls and said, you’re not paying for that. The CJ gets funded because that’s why it exists.

You know, as for situations just like these you know, it was just, it was neat to be able to get to know some some members of the community a little bit better and just, just help out in some pretty dire situations, make Christmas happen for a lot of families. You know, that’s, that’s been a. A big time of year for us historically, it’s just making sure with something like the kids fund, that the kids are having a great Christmas.

And if mom and dad aren’t able to make that happen, for whatever reason, we just want to be able to help out however we can. So that’s been, that’s been such a neat thing and such a cool tool to use cause like, you know, like, like Jerry always said that that was a really important part of the job always is going to be, you know, afraid he was going to have any kind of future whatsoever.

It’s, it’s going to have to be helping people and it’s going to have to be local. And, and that’s what the kids fund is.


Seth:
You touched again on Jerry there and I think back to my life and there’s been some really key mentors along the way. There’s no way that, you know, I would have had half the success of my life without some key players some key mentors.

What does that relationship with Jerry meant to you and how has that helped you kind of get where you are.

JD: He’s like the funnest uncle ever. Like, I wouldn’t call him a father figure cause he’s too reckless. Right? Like he’s just these two hammered. Like I wouldn’t go and call them that, but no, he he’s just like, he’s been, it’s been really cool.

Like it was awesome to get to work with them because it was just such a bucket list thing. I just like and what actually wasn’t even a bucket list thing. That’s a freaking lie. Working with Forbes was, was too wild to have been on my bucket list. If I’m being fully honest with you, that was just like a dude I listened to and I thought I’ll never get to work with the guy.

I’m never even think I would work around him nevermind directly with him. So he was such a killer due to, to learn off of in the room, but then also to like form like a personal relationship and friendship with him outside of that, because one of the most incredible things to me anyway has, you know, was Jerry’s like his success, not only over a very long term, but how he managed to, I think for the most part, you know, maintain a really great balance, you know, that was like a thing he did that he showed up to do, but he also had a personal life and he also had had values, you know, and.

One example is just like, how all about his wife, Jerry is like, he he’ll be the first guy to tell you, like, like Shelly is his queen and he’ll, he’ll say it loudly and proudly. And he isn’t one ounce full of shit on that front. Like Shelly’s everything, you know? And I think having some one, like that was, was just so important for him.

And that was such a big building block for him. It was just like, there were so many things like I wanted to emulate, you know, and just, didn’t just try to be like, you know, like Jerry, not only professionally, but also personally, without trying to steal all of his habits. Cause some of them are bad.


JP:
There’s this whole persona behind the mic that I think like that was one of the things that caught my attention when I got into radio was man, I really, I love this guy on the mic. I want to be just like him. And he, he personified the radio station to me and then you’d go and you’d talk to them. And you’re like, wow, it’s just like this whole other world of who this person is.

And it’s so interesting to get to know them behind the mic

JD: just a, like a gigantic personality like that, that dude is. Like just runs a room. I, I, that was one of the first things I marveled at about him and I still Marvel at it about how he can just command a space much like a court jester would have in medieval times not to be taken too seriously.

Never take him on a factual level,


Seth:
I guess a couple more things here before before we wind up, my mom was actually also from Rocky mountain house, by the way. Yeah, she was born in and spent most of her childhood there. So in an alternate universe, maybe we would have grown up in the same area, but it didn’t work out that way.

Anyway, she suggested to me that we should do listener questions this year or this season. So I, I asked her to provide some questions. So this is a questions from mama, Seth, I think, is going to be a segment this season. And so what she’s got is how do you cope with the stress in your career?

And do you have any tips to avoid burnout?

JD: I think just like making sure that. My time away from the radio station looks nothing like the radio station, if that makes sense initially, like, because, because I honestly do love what I do. It was hard for it not to like leak into my personal life. And it was like, the lines got really blurry between church and state.

A lot of the time, you know, like one one of my mentors and my friend Stu had always said to me, he’s a long-time radio guy had always said, this isn’t who we are. This is, this is what we do. And I thought that was like, like super powerful. And those were words that like, I’ve leaned upon a lot and just remembering that like five to 10, like you do that thing.

And then like, there’s, there’s 19 more hours of the day. What are you going to do with them? Because they can’t all be jazz hands. Yeah. I think just like trying to find a balance, you know, for me that meant taking a bit of a different approach to, to like vacations. Oh, my ideal vacation truthfully is, is alone probably.

And just like fleeing the scene and going to Europe for like a, like a week or two and just, just kind of wandering, taking a bunch of books and just not talking for a while. That became like a really important thing. Those wings have been clipped, thanks to COVID for a little while, but you know, you find different ways to do that kind of around these parts.

Yeah, I think just making sure that like, you know, again, back to mindfulness, like making sure, like there’s, there’s good things happening for your brain to not only give it a break, but make sure it’s like tuned up and ready to do another five hours the next morning. And also having just like a lot of people in my life.

That, to be honest, like, like don’t need me to be JD. They just, they just want me to be. John probably actually it’s mostly Jonathan if it’s my mom’s death. And they usually like Jonathan has followed with a Jonathan David, which means I’m in a world of trouble. But yeah, I think just, just making sure that like, it isn’t, it isn’t show all the time either because it, it can be very hard to shut off at times.

So making sure that you’re. Cognizant about, about making sure you take a break from that, that the Jonathan thing hits home for me being another person who lives with initials isn’t as a name. Anytime I hear John Paul, I know my I’m just tracking me down that street lights are on and I’m not home yet.


Seth:
That’s funny. I don’t have that problem, but I hear south Wendell and cause you don’t have song lights where you are. That’s right.

So J D just on a, on the way out of here. I know we talked a little bit about this before, but how do you feed your mind and what are you working on personally in terms of development any goals in the horizon here for yourself?

JD: Well, I’m kind of thinking about getting in a fight and that like, I’ve almost shouldn’t have said it out loud, cause I’m not totally sure I’m going to do it, but now maybe I’ve committed myself to it.

But I was actually telling Amy my girlfriend this, and I hadn’t said it out loud until I said it to her. And I’ve still kind of been thinking about it, but back to like doing things that scare them. I’ve never been in a fight like I’m 33 years old and I’ve never had to throw down. You can, you can derive from that, whatever you want about me personally, but I don’t know what it’s like to have been in a fight.

And I think that scares me a little when I think about it. Cause I wouldn’t really know what to do. But I also love mixed martial arts. So I’ve been thinking about like finding one of those wimps of warrior programs. I mean, there’s a bunch of them, right. Finding a local gym and maybe just, you know, really tackling something that, that really truthfully, if I’m being honest with you guys, cause we’re all friends here kind of scares the shit out of me being in a fight and learning how to get in a fight.

I don’t really want to hurt anybody. I just want to kind of see how it feels and take on a challenge like that. Cause to me, that’s, that’s like a mental and a physical challenge. So that’s, that’s what I’m kind of like hummin’ and hawin’ about.


Seth:
Well, you should we had one of our guests in season one, a friend of mine, Adam Huxley.

He was a. Pro hockey player and he, he was not a goal score. I’ll put it that way. He he, he was in a few fights in his day, but he’s actually, he played in Las Vegas with the Wranglers before the NHL team. And he, he trained with the DS brothers. Yeah, he’s tight with them. He walked out with them for their fights and stuff like, oh, cool.

So I was thinking like, we could get hucks down here and he could teach you how to fight and be fun,

JD: you’re going to try to get me in a fight with Hawks. I don’t know Hawks, but based on those lines. Yeah. Quick little, couple of facts you shared with me. I don’t want to find Hawks can teach. You can teach you, we can get them.


JP:
We’ll put ya on some rollerblades


Seth:
Awesome. You were going somewhere else before I jumped in there.

JD: Ah, no. Yeah, that’s just, you know, just more, more stuff like that I think is, is just kind of my Mo I just, I just want to keep doing, you know, stuff that scares me and keep challenging myself. And hopefully just, just, you know, again, back to the snowball, I hate to overuse the analogy, but hopefully just, just keep the momentum of that snowball, because it’s just, there’s just, there’s so much joy to be derived from this whole thing.

I I’ve struggled for a very, very long time to just kind of find like, find joy in life. I think that’s probably like my, my greatest grapple is just, is just finding happy. And I think as a guy who has to make other people happy for a living sometimes you just, you just focus on that and you don’t worry about how happy you are.

And I’ve started to realize like how powerful it is. Taking the fear back, treating yourself a whole lot better learning to love yourself and finding that happy. And I think that’s probably just my, my biggest overarching goals. Kind of trying to maintain what we’re doing here because the snowball feels like it’s rolling in the right direction.


Seth:
That’s beautiful, man. I love it. Much respect and really appreciate you hopping on the show with us today and look forward to continuing this discussion. This was great. Thank you. Thanks. Thanks for having me guys. This is, and thank you for having me. I really appreciate,


JP:
Hey, thanks for listening to today’s episode.


Seth:
If you like what you heard today, and you’d like to tap into your inner wisdom, check us out on the bestow, joe.com, Instagram, LinkedIn Facebook,


JP:
or send us a message for a free discovery session to coaching@thebizdojo.com.


Seth:
We hope to hear from you soon. See you next week.

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